Are you paying attention? Do I need to send someone over and Gibbs-slap you? (Do I need to send someone over to explain what a Gibbs-slap is?) Go down to the lower right hand corner of your computer screen and click where it shows the time. Go ahead. I’ll wait, and unless you’re an even worse dork than I am, you won’t break anything. I am, of course, operating under the assumption that you are using a Windows based computer. I don’t have any idea what’s in the lower right hand corner of a MAC or any flavor of pad except the LCARS GUI based PADD. You’ll either get that or you won’t.
So – you there yet? Good. Click the arrow on the right hand side of the calendar thirteen times. Take your shoes off if necessary. You (and your DeLorian)will have arrived at the right place – and time – when the calendar heading reads November, 2012. If it reads September, 2010, close the calendar and start over again from the beginning, but the time use the other right.
Seriously, if it took you more than one try, you might want to stop reading here because if that confused you, the rest is going to be way over your head and frankly, you probably shouldn’t be involved in this anyway.
Now – are you toughing it out? Did both you and your calendar (with or without the optional DeLorian) finally arrive at November, 2012? Good! Now wind your way to the second Tuesday of November, 2012, which will actually be the third Tuesday on the calendar because of the way it’s laid out, but don’t let that confuse you. If the Mayan’s are right, none of this is going to matter anyway.
Your finger – or mouse pointer - should be resting on November 13th, 2012. Got it? Make sure, because this is important. Apart from the face that the date is the 13th day of the month, or that it falls exactly thirteen months from the day before yesterday, (and boy are numerologists having fits with this one) if you’re still with me on this, you are one of the people who need to be paying attention because this specific day, November 13th, 2012, thirteen months from now is the second Tuesday of November, and you know that that means: in 1789 Ben Franklin wrote “Nothing in life is certain except Death and Taxes”, and in 2012 we will elect a new POTUS, again presuming we ARE smart enough to not re-elect the current one, and also assuming the current administration doesn’t cancel the election, a possibility not as far-fetched as you might think.
This is an important election. Our future as a nation may very well hinge on the outcome of this election – if in fact Barry Soetoro doesn’t cancel it. It’s an idea that the Demoratic Governor of North Carolina, Bev Purdue (not to be confused with the poultry people) likes.
And it’s not the only issue confusing the already murky waters. Republicans can’t stop calling each other names long enough to agree to stop calling each other names, much less talk about solutions and agree on a candidate.
Are you old enough to remember Kennedy-Nixon? People in this country were genuinely worried that the Pope would exert too much influence on a Roman Catholic president if he were elected. No one seemed too worried about the prospect of a Quaker President. Well how about one who may have to choose between the constitution and a fable about an archeologically and anthropologically improvable national history? Even when the only alternative at the moment is a Kenyan born socialist whose political ties are closer to Muhammad than George Washington.
But, on the other hand, maybe the Mayan’s will have got it right, and none of this will matter in the end.
And even if they’re wrong, I take comfort in the words God gave a Jewish Scholar/Prophet held captive by Nebuchadnezzar over 600 years before the birth of Christ:
“Then Daniel went to his house and told his friends Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah about the matter, [urging] them to ask the God of heaven for mercy concerning this mystery, so Daniel and his friends would not be killed with the rest of Babylon's wise men. The mystery was then revealed to Daniel in a vision at night, and Daniel praised the God of heaven and declared:
May the name of God
be praised forever and ever,
for wisdom and power belong to Him.
He changes the times and seasons;
He removes kings and establishes kings.
He gives wisdom to the wise
and knowledge to those
who have understanding.
He reveals the deep and hidden things;
He knows what is in the darkness,
and light dwells with Him.
I offer thanks and praise to You,
God of my fathers,
because You have given me
wisdom and power.
And now You have let me know
what we asked of You,
for You have let us know
the king's mystery.”
(Daniel 2: 17-23 Holman Christian Standard Bible)