Dear President Obama, Vice President Biden, Members of the United States Senate and members of the Unites States House of Representatives:
I am a natural born American Citizen and an American Taxpayer, and therefore, your boss. I have just completed your annual performance review. Based on my comprehensive study vis-a-ve your job performance and the state of our government while entrusted to your care, and after very careful consideration, I am sorry to inform you that your services are no longer required.
Please have your personal effects removed from your government offices and vacate the premises by midnight tomorrow. I fully trust this will not become a difficult issue and security personnel will not have to become involved.
Plainly put, you are all fired effective immediately.
David J. Roth